Trump to Turkeys: "YOU'RE COOKED!"
Sleepy Joe's Thanksgiving pardons revoked by Presidente Trump
MINNESOTA - Joe Biden, in the remaining days of his presidency, gave presidential pardons to the January 6th committee, Anthony Fauci, General Mark Milley, Peach, and Blossom.
Unfamiliar with those last two names? Peach and Blossom are Thanksgiving turkeys who received their pardon on the White House lawn in 2024. They have since gone to live in a children’s petting zoo in Minnesota.
These traitorous turks were living the high life of eating pellets from a gumball machine and having children tug on their wattles. They believed themselves safe from the axe, that is, until today.
On March 17th, near midnight, Presidente Trump posted this on Truth Social: “The ‘Pardons’ that Crooked And/Or Sleepy Joe Biden gave to the torpid turkeys known as Fauci, Milly [sic], Hunter, Peach, Blossom, ETCETERA, are hereby decreed, VOID, VILLAINOUS, VACANT, VACUOUS, VEXED, AND OF NO FURTHER FORCE OR EFFECT because of the fact that President Autopen signed them with an Autopen in Blue ink. IF THE INK IS NOT BLACK THEY MUST BE SENT BACK OR SOMETHING. Also, I won the Trump Golf Club championship yesterday. 20-under-par.”
Peach and Blossom were picked up at their Minnesota petting zoo early Monday morning and transported to a waiting helicopter. By noon both turkeys were residents of an El Salvadoran mega-prison. Peach and Blossom have joined the Avian Brotherhood for protection and pecked a couple of Tren de Aragua gang members to death.