Austin to lose ‘Weird’ association, now wants to be kept ‘brat’

"brat isn't just a word. It's a verb."

A new and inexplicable meme associating Donald Trump and the Republican party with ‘weird’ has sent the city of Austin scrambling for a new slogan.

For years people fought to “Keep Austin Weird.” What that meant was anyone’s guess. Now Republicans - formally known as squares, stuffed shirts, fascists and normies - are considered weird. 

Jacob Dhawson O’Lafferty-Chang, the founder of GumFuzz PR agency and visionary behind artificial viral trends like the Dune 2 popcorn bucket, Billie Eilish’s entire career and calling Trump weird, has come to Austin’s rescue.

“People don’t want to be weird anymore,” the 23-year-old CEO and AI Wordsmith said. “What was weird is normal. Now what’s weird is boomers wearing ankle socks and combing your hair into a side part.”

His answer to Austin’s dilemma? Keep Austin brat. 

“Everybody wants to be brat. Charli XCX’s new album is the hottest thing around. brat isn’t just a word. It’s a verb. It’s an adverb, a proper noun, a philosophy of life and more. In one or two months our new campaign will have you thinking Austin is the only destination to have your perfect brat summer.”

I asked what the city will do when brat and Charli XCX aren’t popular anymore. He scoffed and said it would never happen.

Austin’s new slogan and putrescent green logo will be unveiled early next week.